I've long been a fan of Texts From Last Night. I'm not sure which I like better, that or FML. They are both equally funny and inappropriate. Either way here are some recent goodies.

(425): Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.

(541): I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.

(903): My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.

(305): false alarm. still invincible.

(504): i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out


(248): If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in

(614): this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had

(303): Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!

(724): As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME

(931): don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding

(412): dude i feel like crap
(413): well u did eat a lot of play-doh

(773): I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.

(941): Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to


elyssa said...

a few thoughts:

i am obsessed with blitzen trapper furr lately.

your photography is awesome, and i wish a) we'd known that when we got married, b) that we were getting married again so i could pay you to make me look like your sisters. ; )

i feel cool when you comment on my blog.

someday i will be as cool as you.

but probably not.

we should play when we get back to the sparkling metropolis of provo.

amber said...